So the title has nothing to do with the actual content of this post… I just thought maybe it would catch some people’s attention. Plus, it’s true…… do you know anybody who likes dry elbows? #clickbait
Anyway, thought of the week:
We have to give up what we want before we get it.
Not an earth-shattering concept I guess, but something I’m for sure learning in a new way. We need to really release the idea of getting [insert whatever you want] when we want it, in order to get it.
I’ll speak for myself here: I’m finding that when I really desire something in particular, I almost never get it… at least not in the time frame that I originally wanted it. It’s like I try to receive whatever I want by hoping for it, praying for it, and building up in my head how amazing it’ll be once I get it, and it’s as if God chuckles, shakes his head, and lovingly tells me that I don’t know what’s good for me.
I guess He’s right… a lot of times I have no idea what’s best for me. [A humbling reminder.] In fact, a lot of times I think back on things I used to want (and didn’t get) and am grateful as I realize now that had I gotten said things, my life almost definitely would have been much worse off, and not better as I initially thought.
So my new approach:
Tell God what I want at first glance, while acknowledging that it may not be the best thing for me. In other words, I’m not afraid to be open about what I want on instinct, and to pray for what I think would be good for me, but am careful now to realize (contrary to what many believe) that I myself am not God, and to instead do my best to surrender to accepting an alternative, and even perhaps the opposite of whatever I want myself, trusting that the real God knows best.
I’ve found since starting this approach, one of two things happens:
One, I get an alternative, or sometimes the opposite of what I initially wanted, and I feel oddly at peace with it. There’s a level of disappointment… not gonna lie, sometimes more significant than others depending on the situation, but there is overriding peace nonetheless. There’s something really helpful about picturing beforehand what it might be like to receive the opposite of what I wanted at first. Nine times out of ten I realize that receiving even the opposite of what I want wouldn’t be the end of the world, and I’m reminded that I’m lucky to have the problems that I do… Many would not even call them problems, and this quickly puts things into perspective.
Or two, I get what I wanted initially (usually after some waiting), and I’m pleasantly surprised and oftentimes incredibly overjoyed. It’s as if when I take a step back and give away the notion that I need whatever I want, God nods his head in approval and says, “Here. You’re ready for it now.”
Quick but important side note: you can’t beat the system. I’ve tried. You know you’re trying to beat the system when you try to convince God and yourself that you wouldn’t mind not getting what you want and you’d be just fine getting the opposite (all in hopes of actually getting what you want)… but then when you don’t get what you want, you’re distraught and angry and anything but peaceful… If this happens, don’t beat yourself up… but do take a step back and try (again) to let go of your desires… for real this time.
So I guess I’m (re-)realizing that God doesn’t necessarily give us what we want. He gives us what we need. And trusting that God knows best, I realize that I actually don’t want what I want. I want what I need. So if I want what I need and if God always gives us what we need, then in actuality, I’ll always get what I want in the end…. you follow?